PDM 017: 3 Signs That You Are Facing The Hangover Effect Right Now

Lucas P. Johnson: It's crazy how many times we find ourselves looking to something or someone else to satisfy our hunger. Whether it be for happiness, fun, pleasure or work, we all face it at times in our life. How many times have you faced what we like to call the hangover effect? Think about it while we roll the intro.

Narrator: Welcome to the home of Project Dream Mastery. Here at PDM, we are challenging the status quo of what it means to follow your dreams and how to unlock the power those dreams will bring to your life. The show experience will be unscripted, authentic and transparent. So now sit back, relax and get inspired with your hosts, Lucas Johnson and Patryk Labuzek.

Patryk Labuzek: Welcome to the 17th episode of Product Dream Mastery show where we help you follow your dreams, defy expectations, dream big and love deeply.

Lucas P. Johnson: My name is Lucas Johnson based out of Charlotte, North Carolina.

Patryk Labuzek: And I'm Patryk Labuzek based out of Dublin, Ireland.

Lucas P. Johnson: Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast to be the first to receive new episode releases. And if you're interested, this episode is available with video. So check out our website at ProjectDreamMastery.com to watch now.

Patryk Labuzek: So today, we are going to take a look into the hangover effect. So for some of us, it's an all too familiar effect, put your orders in might be an occasional ripening as you might say. Feeling kind of that brings quite a bit of thought and emotion and not so great at times but sheer luck. So how about we take a deeper dive into the subject?

Lucas P. Johnson: It's really amazing, buddy, to think about this because it's really applicable not to just our lives but every single person. And get your mind out of the gutter if you're listening to this right now. It's not just the alcohol consumption or other things that you might intake into your body. It's those emotions, those feelings, those highs and lows in your life. And Paddy, this is something that we have had a great deal of experience with traveling. I mean even being able to travel together in the U.S. for a month last year and all of a sudden, we went to your place for, you know, and Ibiza and all these places. And then that was our high. That was our peak. You know? And then there's all these things that add up. And now, man, we're just like man, I need to get, I need to get back up there. But now all of a sudden, you hit that low.

Patryk Labuzek: Yeah, you do especially after so many great memories that you create, so many experiences. I mean even traveling with your friends, being around your friends, being around your very tight circle of positive people and doing all those wild things, you know, at the end of it all. It kind of leaves you hanging. So I guess just the whole word hangover. It's definitely on point and yeah, crazy, crazy.

Lucas P. Johnson: I try to think about hangover effect is okay, you had a little too much to drink. So you go to the bar. Okay. You have a lot of fun. You know, you're using something to substitute or to get you to another level. And for some of us, we don't need it to make us who we are. I mean others, we use it as a crutch. We use it as something to lean on. And if you're looking at it from that lens and you are thinking about how does this apply to your life or how is this applicable to you, think about when you get to your highs. You know, what caused you to get to that high? What was it all the traveling? Was it the people in your life? Was it something that you did? Was it that hole in one that you shot? Was it the girl you took on a date? I mean Paddy, I mean that's something that really may rise with you today. But if it takes you to that level and you're happy, you're at am all time happy point, it's just crazy to think like when's the low gonna hit? I mean not to think about it that way because we all like to get at our highs. Right? But when's the ball gonna drop? It's weird to think that way. Right?

Patryk Labuzek: Yeah. It's definitely a weird way of thinking. Some might say very negative, in fact. But you know, I totally agree. Like when you're so on top of your game and everything's going well and you're having the best time of your life, you know, at the back of your head, you have this feeling, you have this thought that things can't go on like this forever. It's too good to be true. And sooner or later, you know, the ball's going to drop. And you know, I'm not saying you're gonna get thrown off a cliff. But gradually that feeling of, you know, just like this boss ass feeling is going to gradually decline. And that leaves you with this hangover effect at the end of the day. And the question is how do we cope with it? How do we get out of it? Lucas, I pose this question on you.

Lucas P. Johnson: That emotional state that we are facing and looking at it from different lenses is really crazy. I mean, Paddy, you're asking me a question that is so hard to understand because we don't get to figure it out until we're at our low. Right? I mean we're trying to figure out what we want and where we see ourselves. But most of the time, we're at our highs when we're trying to evaluate our life. When we're at the lows, sometimes we get lost. We're lost in the negativity. And as you were saying earlier is this is not a really positive topic. But the truth be told, not everything in our life is going to be positive. We want it to be and we do so well at pushing away the negatives on this show. And sometimes you have to look at the things and ask is it really going to be positive all the time? Because it's not. You know, we focus on defy expectations, dream big and love deeply. But not everything is going to be positive.

Patryk Labuzek: Well, you see, Lucas, one can say that we wouldn't know what positivity is without the negative side of things. You know? So and I feel like it's only when we're at the low point in our lives, we can actually figure out how to deal with them and only go up. And that's when, you know, the positive thinking, positive mindset kicks in with, you know, all that goes with it. So we definitely need to be at some stage of our life and it's going to happen. Sooner or later at the low, we need to figure out our shit and then just climb. Climb, bro. Reach to the sky. And for the record, actually the sky is not the limit.

Lucas P. Johnson: The sky is not the limit. Interesting topic you brought up there. So what is the limit? How do we define our own limits? How do we find a limit?

Patryk Labuzek: I like to think that we don't have any limits. I mean look, if we did, we wouldn't have gone to the moon. First of all, if we had limits, we wouldn't have explored going to Mars. We wouldn't have explored, you know, all of those mind blowing topics to our head like everything related with space, you know, like space travel and time travel which apparently just recently has been proven to be mathematically possible and all that kind of stuff. So I mean man, there are no limits. The only limits that we have we place them upon ourselves. It's all in our head and you have to break through. You have to think outside the box. You have to go outside of your comfort zone and there are no limits. There really are none.

Lucas P. Johnson: So if there aren't any limits, why do we get to this point in our lives where we have emotional hangovers or we have hangovers from other sources? I'm going to say that. Well, what is the rationale you think truly that leads to it? If we don't have limits and we can keep getting to our highs, every single day can be a high. Why can't it be if there's no limits?

Patryk Labuzek: Very good question, first of all, Lucas. But it's not a very simple answer now, is it, to this question? It's very broad. I mean we do not have limits. The limits that we do have, and I'm going to repeat it, we place on ourselves. It's all in our head. And the reason why we go through the lows is because maybe we are not reaching our goals. Maybe we're not reaching our target. Maybe we're not reaching that limit that we've placed upon ourselves. And this brings us down. I mean like if you don't see progress, what do you feel? You know, if you're stuck at 50% and you're not moving to 60%, 70% with your life, then you're stuck. You're in this hangover zone. You know what I mean? And so those are the lows. Those are lows in our life. And look, everybody's got them. You have them. I have them. I mean right now with during the COVID times, I think the whole world is going through a low. And you know, right now the limit for all of us is how to find a cure to this potentially fatal disease. That's the limit. So we definitely are at our lowest right now as a whole, as a civilization. But there is no limit. We will find that vaccine. We will find ways to live with what we have. Yeah, I'm probably going to leave it at that. That was okay.

Lucas P. Johnson: It's a roller coaster, man. It truly is. Life is a roller coaster. So yeah, man, it's crazy to think about all these things that we have that are going through our minds. I mean even with Project Dream Mastery, I think about all these things that we have to do. And I get on this roller coaster of highs and lows and I talked to you about this. Okay. Yeah, we're working on this new page. It's going to be awesome. And then I review it. I'm like wow, this thing sucks. I need to fix this or Paddy, I need your eyes on this because man, it could be so much better. And when we get on these highs or these lows, it's really hard to get out of that rut sometimes. So trying to define a limit is impossible. It's impossible to find our limits. It's impossible to also have these expectations on us that someone wants us to achieve. But if we don't want to achieve them, it's going to be impossible. So when I look at Project Dream Mastery and I think about the episodes and the recordings and all these things we have to do, sometimes it brings me to a low. When I look at the things that I can achieve, the things we can achieve, the things that we can do by just releasing one episode, by having one person listen, by having one mind shaped, evolved or even one takeaway, it brings me to a high. And that roller coaster goes on and on and on. And it's a circle effect. We don't always have highs every single day. We're human. We're human first and foremost. So Paddy, it's crazy to think that we met two years ago now, three years ago, something like that. Going on three years.

Patryk Labuzek: Something like that. Yeah.

Lucas P. Johnson: Going on three years probably in January. And I mean we've been on so many roller coasters, so many hangover effects. I mean even hangovers.

Patryk Labuzek: Very true.

Lucas P. Johnson: So if you were to pick one point in your life where you could just go back and live it again, what would it be? Just one point and I'll expand on that.

Patryk Labuzek: Easy answer. And I mean I don't know if people listening to this already think this or not. But I always go back to this one moment. You know, me landing in Sydney, 1st of February 2018. Right? I think. That's it. Like from then on, from the 1st of February 2018 to mid-July or was it even the start of August 2018, it's been a high. It's been this constant high. And honestly, it has been getting gradually higher and higher and higher and the boundary was constantly raised every single day. Every single day. Like every single day brought something new. It brought new people into our lives. It brought new experiences into our lives. It brought new places into our lives because, you know, we just explain to the audience, like we are not these kinds of people that just stay in our rooms and, you know, record these episodes or whatnot. We go out our way. We explore the world. We explore different cultures. We explore how, you know, everything works. That's who we are. And you know, every single day has been different, has been filled with adventures, has been a high. And so I would say the entire time in Australia and while we were traveling and all that, highs, highs, highs. And you know, for me, even it didn't finish in the high anyway. Me riding that wave didn't finish in August to be honest. Because from then on, I went to live in Beijing for an entire year. That was like my final year of college and even though it was a lot of stress involved, you know, writing your thesis and all that kind of stuff, exams, projects, all that, it's been a high. You know? I can confidentially say it's been a high. And it's only after I came back to home, came back to Dublin, after all of you guys visited me in Ireland, after we did a few things in Europe, I've got to settle down a little bit. I'm not goign to settle down because I haven't. But I've remained in this one place. You know, found a cozy spot, got a full time job, all the adult code that came along with it. That's when things started to slip away going downward. So even though things have become a roller coaster, like you were saying. And I'll go back to that point. From that point on, you know, we were climbing, climbing, climbing, climbing this hill, this mountain to the peak. And then all of a sudden, man, it's a roller coaster. You just go down. It goes up, down, left, right. It's crazy. It's all over the place. It's a roller coaster of emotions. Right? And that has been the journey. So obviously, there has been lows, you know, working long hours, not having time to record the podcast, not having time to do all the things that we love because of work basically at the end of the day. But at the same time, if not for the work, we wouldn't be able to do the things that we do. So it's picking ourselves up. You know, it's always thinking in a positive way, this positive mindset that we're all talking all about. Throughout these episodes, it's intertwined between every single one of them. It's really, it's our lifestyle. You know? Because even when you're at the all time low, you might think there's always a way out. There's always a positive way of looking at it. You know? Not everything is negative. It really isn't. So even though you might think that, you know, everything turned to shit, you know, there's nothing you can do about it, it's worthwhile just to sit down and like drink coffee the first few months in low down. Just sit down with yourself and think what you have. And, you know, I feel like every single one of us will realize that what we have is great. It might not be our dream and it might not be, you know, our peak, our all time high. But it's a good place to be. It's a good time. Well, not so good.

Lucas P. Johnson: It's not so good. But...

Patryk Labuzek: But it could be way worse. So that's how I look at it, Lucas.

Lucas P. Johnson: You know, life is a roller coaster, you know, even with COVID going on and our heart goes out, as I said in the last episode, our heart goes out to those that have lost a loved one both from Paddy and I. But life is a roller coaster. This too shall pass. You know? It's too many too often that, going back to the topic here, is we get lost and lost in what could be, what could have, what should have. And we forget to ask ourselves be happy. If we did that, would that make us happier than we are right now? Too often, we forget to ask ourselves if we're truly happy and we just go day to day doing the same thing over and over and over again. Some days we have good days, others we don't. We have bad days. Hell, I mean three out of five days a week, I'm like shit, why am I doing this? Not that podcast. I'm just saying like work. You know, sometimes you get to these things you're dealing with you're dealing with problems, complex situations and you get to know a lot of different people. And you question. You question what you're doing. You get that high and that low. And you know, then the hangover sets in. You get an all time high. You get a promotion, your new title, fancy new title. It's a big thing. New pay scale, maybe a new vehicle, new car.

Patryk Labuzek: Oh, are you pointing your finger at me?

Lucas P. Johnson: And then you buy it and you enjoy it. But then it starts to fade. That feeling, it starts to get to a year goes by and that's new car is no longer new. It gets a dent in it. It gets a few nicks and scratches and it starts to fade. And lows and the lows keeps setting in and we start to, we never really get time to ask ourselves in those moments are we truly happy or are we just happy with the thing, the feeling, the place, the people? Are we truly happy? So if we get to those points in our lives where we can ask that and we take the five minutes, how five minutes just to ask are you happy? Paddy, I'm the happiest when I get to jump on the show with you and talk about life, talk about things that have happened to us. And for one person to have a takeaway from this show is amazing. We were just talking about this before the show started is we've had people reach out to us and tell us how the show is doing and how they like it and they're in their feelings, in their comments and so forth. And it is truly incredible. Thank you so much for those, first off. It means the world like we talked about in previous episodes. It is just incredible. And Paddy, you could probably agree with that?

Patryk Labuzek: A hundred percent. Yeah.

Lucas P. Johnson: Yeah, no words. It's just, it's amazing. So those are the highs, having people tell us that makes this show feel so worth it and having those highs. But now let me ask you something. The same goes for the lows. So what does that feel like? What is that hangover effect? What is the hangover effect? Paddy, what does the hangover effect to you?

Patryk Labuzek: It's this very complex feeling of right after the all time high or right after high. You know, when you just know that, you know, that was great. That was great. And it's gonna take some time to get back to this point. And that's when the hangover effect kicks in for me. It's after all these great things when you go back to your normal, when, you know, you do all the ordinary stuff. You know, you go grocery shopping, you pay your bills, you go to work in the morning. That's the hangover effect. But then again, you reach your high. You know, you reach your high and then everything is great again. But then again, you get that hangover straight after it. So it's that constant, you know, those constant up, down, up, down, up, down like a heartbeat. I mean there cannot be ups without the downs. So it's essential.

Lucas P. Johnson: I love that.

Patryk Labuzek: It's essential. We can't skip it. We can't fast forward from one high to the other because that's not how it works. Like in order to enjoy the next high, we need to have the hangover effect. And that's how life is and we cannot change that. But, you know, because of it, we can enjoy the high or maybe the new all time high even more so.

Lucas P. Johnson: It's really crazy how human beings are. I mean how we evolve and how we act and behaviors and just the whole nine yards behind how humans are and who they are. I like to think that we enjoy the moments more when we have to go through the lows to get to the highs. For me, that hangover effect doesn't happen, I mean it doesn't happen all the time. But I mean we're human. It happens all of us. But when it does set in, how do you, how do you feel? How do I feel? Well, I feel down. I feel like I just want to lay around. You know? Just as they say, sob in your own pity. That's as they say, I mean when I get down, I like to contemplate what the next steps are. I like to figure out what's going to happen next, what's the, how do I get to the next step in my life where I'm going to be happy. And we have to go through that process. It's a sign of almost emotional intelligence to figure out where you need to be next. For me, I start and I sit on the couch or I sit in the office or hell, I even do it through the working sessions we have for the podcast and the show. I'm doing it right now, thinking through how can I get to my next high. Not high. But how do I get to that all time high where I feel great about life, feel great about the things that are going on, the people in my life, my circle, my tribe, feel good about the people in, you know, my family? Is everyone doing well? Or how can I help them be better? All these things contribute to your all time high. So Paddy, for you, when did you feel at your all time high?

Patryk Labuzek: I mean it happens, happens often, you know, when everything's going well. You know, you don't have to be constantly visiting new places, doing wild things like jumping off cliffs, for example, or, you know, scuba diving in tropical locations or meeting famous or successful people every single day to be at that high. I mean a high for me could be or is actually just, you know, being happy with the job that I have, being happy with even the materialistic things that I have, you know, that my family is well, healthy, happy, my friends, my close circle of friends, you know, being able to chat with you, being able to, you know record the Project Dream Mastery show, being able to write my blog. That's why I'm happy. That's my high. And you know, it happens all too often that, you know, we reach our point we're super high and then we just linger there. You know? It's a straight line, goes very linear. It's straight. It doesn't jump down. It doesn't go up. But then eventually, you know, you get or, you know, going back to professional life, you get that new promotion and then you get a boost, you know, you go a little bit higher. So it's like, think of it more of a, like a mountain, you know, as you climb. But you know, it's not always very steep, up a hill. It, you know, has its bumps. You go down a little bit, you know, and then you've got a little area where it's all like nice and straight and then you go up again and then another bump and all that kind of stuff. So, you know, like for me, the high is the ordinary things. But you've got to learn to appreciate, you know, those ordinary things. And I mean, we can only appreciate those ordinary things when we see, when we experience the lows. And so particularly our own lows, it's lots of other people. And that's why I find traveling so inspiring. You know, like allows me to self-develop in wow, just all over the place, across the entire, like me, you know, becoming better and better. Because I see the struggle. It's not always easy, you know, especially for other people. When you see that, when you analyze it and when you think about it and it sticks in your mind, you know, you figure out that, you know, what you might have thought is your low and it's not. You know? You're on your high. And I guess that answers the question, you know, the ordinary things.

Lucas P. Johnson: How about when you make a decision? Do you go through that process too? Say you make a bad decision? Does that affect you in the moment? Or does that affect you the next day? I have times where I personally make a decision and then I immediately know I made the wrong decision. Did you go back on what you said you're going to do? Did you go back on what you're doing?

Patryk Labuzek: I mean it happens. Of course, it does. It happens. And pretty much straight after that decision, you know, oh, shit, maybe that wasn't the best option. You know, it wasn't the best route, the best path to take. But it has been said, it has been done and you need to live with it. You know, end of story.

Lucas P. Johnson: How about when you're at that all time high? I mean you're at that all time high, you think it's the best decision in the moment, you think you're really doing great. But what happens when you go down from that all time high and that fades and fades?

Patryk Labuzek: See, that's exactly when the hangover effect kicks in at. You know, I don't even know the definition of the hangover effect to be honest with you.

Lucas P. Johnson: Me either. That's why this topic's come to life, bro.

Patryk Labuzek: Exactly, exactly. That's why, you know, the definition for me, it's for my personal life and definitely different to you. It's definitely different to someone else. But what you just said there, you know, coming down and you know that you're coming down from the all time high. That's the hangover effect for me.

Lucas P. Johnson: It's crazy how our topics come to life too. I mean this topic was just something that was written down and something that applies to us, applicable to the choices, the decisions that we've made and sitting here and trying to think about where the hangover effect. I mean it's really spitballing what we've done over the years and what we've learned from our mistakes to bring true I would like to say value because people making mistakes, you learn from it. Right?

Patryk Labuzek: Yeah, definitely. Yeah.

Lucas P. Johnson: So many times we need to or we do things for other people I think and it's tough to do sometimes the right thing for ourselves. We're at an all time high but we do things for others that we get burned out. We forget about the most important thing sometimes, our health, our wellness, our well-being. I'm not saying it should be the center of the world and act like that. But your well-being is so crucial and critical to obviously you being alive on this earth and making decisions and making the right choices. Right choices, whatever that means. We live and learn. Win or learn as Cory said in that last episode is win or learn. There is no loss. Win or learn. So this is going to be a short one today because I think that everything we talked about today is just going straight into the books. So Paddy, I want to leave it to you for any homework that you feel that would be very helpful for this episode this week.

Patryk Labuzek: Yeah. So definitely, you know, number one, sit down. Sit down for two minutes. It doesn't take that long. Think what you have and, you know, really think is this your low or are you at your high? You know, where are you? At what point are you in your life? What are you doing? You know, did the hangover effect kick in yet or not? So just analyze like your situation at this very moment and ask yourself is this my high or is it my low? And secondly, if you think it is your low, what can you do to get back to that high? Like we said, actionable steps, you know, lead to your goals, lead to your success. You need to do something about it. It's not enough just to sit there, you know, on your couch and be like man, I'm at my all time low and just linger on it. You know? You have to do something, actionable steps. You know, small baby steps I like to say. Baby steps but they all lead somewhere. You know? And trust me, getting even out for a walk when you feel bad, picking up a book, making yourself a cup of coffee if you like, this brings you one step closer to that peak. You know? So I think I would definitely leave it at that, those two points that I made here that are very important, very important to our mental health especially now when then, you know, maybe we might not be able to see our families all too often because of different restrictions, different for all of us depending on the country that you're in. And so, yeah, that's your homework, guys.

Lucas P. Johnson: I also want to add is take the time to analyze what your hangover effect is, what it means to you because there probably is a definition on this. But the point of the show is not to be straight by the book. I mean we are obviously not medical professionals by any means. So we don't ever intend to come across that way. But the point of the show is to talk about things that really have been relevant to our lives and hopefully are applicable to you. So go on and analyze your own hangover effect. What does that look like? Leave a comment. Let us know what that means to you. And I'd love to take that to the next level and learn and expand on that in one of our shows. So with that said, we just launched our Patreon membership community where you can become one of our elite supporters and gain exclusive access to early releases, live streams and Q&A. We have a few different tiers available with some pretty sweet perks. So make sure to check them out and consider supporting the show. Go to ProjectDreamMastery.com and click the red button that says become a Patreon to learn more. As we reach our monthly goals, we will have some pretty sweet giveaways. If you have not already, please make sure to review the show, subscribe, like and share so that we can reach more amazing listeners like you. All of our shows are available in both audio, video and written form. So make sure to check out our website to access the full experience. Again, thank you so much for joining us today. We look forward to seeing you on the next episode to come. Talk soon.